Growing Up is Hard to do

Without a doubt in the past year plus I have done more growing up and decision making than I have my entire adult life.
Married October 9th, "BFP" November 1st, Buying a House in May, Z's debut in July. That's all part of the reason why I am here blogging. Slow it down and write in down. And I secretly love when people tell me they read it or even just like the Pics of Zoe.  Call me an Attention Whore.

But YEAH, Like way to starting questioning every decision you make.  For Instance, I purchased more bottles online last night (which brings up my burgeoning love affair with diapers.com and Soap.com).

Do I really need more?
Is it just that I HATE washing bottles.
We only have 4.  Whats normal?
Maybe try something more Basic.
WHY Do Dr. Browns have no MANY STINKING parts?!
They really work well.
OK lets  try out a basic, its a $6 investment
Do I REALLY need to keep using glass?
YES you never know.
REALLY, do you just not want to was them aka run the dishwasher with next to nothing in it?
Oh yeah, we need dish detergent too?
Will it kill us and our planet if I don't use 7th Generation?
Ehhhh... Better Not risk it.
Back to the Bottles.
Yah stick with Glass.
What if cause they are heavier she never learns to hold her own bottle and shes "behind"
"Behind" in bottle holding? Is there really such a thing?
Do I really mean "We'll always have to hold it for her"
Is that the Bad Momma alarm, I hear?
Nope.
Its the lunatic alarm, put down the online shopping for everyday items, Kim.

For real, Sometime it feels like every small decision I make all of a sudden has HUGE ramifications.  And I do put a lot of though into things and I have to be willing to take some trial and error.

Will cascade and and a plastic bottle mean certain doom for my family and planet? Probably not.
But then again, I didn't risk it either.  I am willing to bet every person, mother or not, wife or not, Pet owner, Frat boy, homeowner, renter, living a van down by the river-er Feels that way. at least sometimes.  If I do take A will I later regret not doing B? B might be better. Is it really? or are "they" just trying to scare you??

You know "They".  The person who could read and not relate but tell me I am not being careful enough?  This goes so beyond bottles and dish detergent. I KNOW, I'll BANK on it. That despite our best efforts to do right by each other, our home and Zoe someone at some point will say (God Held Them) or think, "Ohhhh Bad Call" and some will sound the crazy alarm.  HECK, I have been both people.  But Life is just one choice after the next. Some are small (see above, I realise this) and some are huge. (Marry Me? Have a Baby?) But in the end, I'll just keep reminding myself of what my Mom said:

 "As long as you try your best, Ill be proud of you"

And to all my girls out there, Don't forget to be proud of you too.

I will not stop my introspective,self indulgent rambling and return to our normally scheduled Cute Zoe pic posts